Undercover
by AlternateTimeline
Summary: AU. FBI agents Naruto and Sasuke are forced to team up on an undercover mission. But there's a twist. Isn't there always? Slash Warning. SasuNaru to come .
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hi all! First Naruto fanfic. I know, shoot me. Anywho, this is SasuNaru. boy on boy. Deal. Feel like flaming? Go ahead! :D I'll toast marshmallows. Thanks! Note: One of my best friends has a pet peeve of people who abuse the Japanese language. Therefore, I am going to stick to English and dispense with the dobes and temes (as much as we all love them :3). I prefer not to butcher, if I can. Oh, and sorry if Sasuke is a bit OOC. But seriously, I can't have him sit there and 'hn' the entire time, now can I. Enjoy!

Sasuke Uchiha's frown deepened as he contemplated the stack of books in front of him. He didn't know why he was putting so much energy into the decision, seeing as he probably wouldn't even get a chance to do much reading. He sighed, selecting a volume after meticulous thought while making it look like a random choice. Even if he didn't get past the back cover, one could always hope.

The twenty-three-year-old FBI agent sidled up to the counter to pay. As soon as the attractive blonde cashier saw the Uchiha approaching, she immediately turned on a charm that would have had a lesser man salivating at her feet. Sasuke groaned inwardly. When would these girls comprehend that he wasn't remotely interested? Cursing his good looks for the umpteenth time, Sasuke idly checked his watch, hoping that the cashier would get the hint. She didn't.

"Is there anything else I can help you with today?" she asked, suggestively raising her eyebrows and flipping her high pony tail over her shoulder.

"No. Just the book." Sasuke gave her his best 'talk-to-me-at-your-own-risk' tone. It didn't go unnoticed, as the girl faltered slightly and hastily rung up his purchase. Sasuke lifted the bag from the counter and, completely ignoring the cashier's shouted invite for coffee, pushed his way past a flustered looking blonde man in a suit on his way out the door.

"Hey, watch it!" the victim cried, affronted. Sasuke didn't bother responding. He had a meeting with the chief in ten minutes, and he was never late. As he exited the bookshop, he overheard the exasperated blonde man saying something to the cashier.

"What do you mean you're sold out?"  
"Well, that hottie who just left bought the last copy." Sasuke rolled his eyes at this comment.

"Damnit! Well, I guess – " The rest of their conversation was unintelligible to the Uchiha as the door shut behind him. He hadn't liked the blonde man. Anyways, orange ties should be illegal. Sasuke smirked at the predicament in which he seemed to have put his unknown adversary and straightened his already flawless navy blue tie. Good thing there were no incompetent idiots like that where he worked.

A/N: Sorry for the ridiculously short chapter, but hopefully, as I get into it more, the length will pick up. Let me know if I make any errors (technical or plot-related; I'm not really a crime writer. ah well.) and I'll be sure to fix them. Reviews are love! Bonus points if you can guess who the blonde cashier was.

Chibi Sakura: Reviewers get cookies!

Chibi Naruto: AND RAMEN.

Chibi Sasuke: Shut UP.

Chibi Sakura: slaps Naruto YEA. Shut up!

maivugia: hehehe, sorry guys, sometimes they get out of their cages. locks them back in

Chibi Sakura: How come Naruto and Sasuke get locked in together? That's not fair!

maivugia: er... we'll get to that later in the story... sweatdrop


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Oh wow, guys, I am so sorry for not updating sooner! School's ending and all, lots of work. But! Two more promises (that I WILL keep): the next chapter will be longer, and it will be uploaded much sooner than this one. Anyways, I hope you like this addition. It's a bit of a filler, but it's necessary information. Thanks to everyone who alterted this fic, and a big thanks to Binxie for my first review!

ENJOY!

The flustered blonde rushed up to the office 235. His first day at his new job – well technically, he was a transfer – and he was late already. _If only that bastard hadn't bought the last copy of the book I wanted, _he thought. _Ah well, no use dwelling_. He finally reached the door and burst into the office without looking up. He skidded to a halt, hands on his knees, panting, orange tie flapping.

"Chief... Hatake…" the blonde panted, "Sorry…I'm late…."

"Ah yes, speak of the devil. Sasuke, meet your new partner, Naruto Uzumaki." Naruto slowly raised his head to find that the chief wasn't the only presence in the room. It took him a full second to take in the stoic figure of a black haired man in a trim black suit situated to the right of the chief, and another full second to recognize him.

"Hey! It's you! That asshole from the bookstore!" Naruto shouted, gesticulating rudely at the man.

Sasuke, on his part, merely raised one elegant eyebrow. Trust Kakashi to put him with this blonde moron. Aside from the ghastly orange tie that Uzumaki had donned –_ Probably in a fit of insanity,_ thought Sasuke, _although he might just be completely colorblind_ – Sasuke hadn't paid much attention to the blonde during their first meeting. Sasuke used Naruto's shocked and angered silence to his advantage. Wordlessly, he took the opportunity to size up his supposed new partner. This Uzumaki character was barely an inch taller than himself, although an inch made quite a difference during a heated argument. _Shirt tails hanging out, one shoe untied, hair in messily gelled spikes,_ Sasuke noticed grimly. He shuddered inwardly. If Uzumaki's investigation abilities were as lax as his careless appearance, then Sasuke definitely had his work cut out for him. Sasuke turned to his Chief.

"Kakashi, is a partner really necessary?" Sasuke shot a death glare at Naruto. Naruto looked even more affronted. "You know perfectly well that I can complete any assignment without flaw."

"Well you see, Sasuke…" Kakashi's hand twitched towards a closed orange volume at the side of his desk. "Having two male agents is an essential part of this assignment."

"Yes, but you still haven't explained – wait, male? Why male?" The Uchiha started.

Naruto, finally able to regain his usually talkative state, also piped up. "Chief, do I have to be put with this asshole? He'll disrupt my style." Naruto grinned cheekily and ran a hand through his spiked hair.

Sasuke inwardly rolled his eyes. _Style? Who did this guy think he is?_ _And just because you die your hair and throw in some gel doesn't mean you're god's gift to women. _

_Or men – _said a small voice at the back of Sasuke's head. He ignored it.

"Sasuke, Naruto, you two _will_ work together on this assignment, and it _will _be completed without complaint. It's a top secret mission for which I specially selected you both." Naruto frowned. The Chief didn't seem to care much what they thought; he kept glancing at that book that looked suspiciously like one that his former chief had fawned over. "And Sasuke, to answer your question, the agents both had to be male because, you see, your assignment…" Kakashi trailed off.

"What?!" Naruto shouted impatiently. He didn't drag himself out of bed at seven in the morning to hang around with some stuck up asshole and some spacey pervert. Sasuke glared at Naruto's impatience.

"… your assignment," Kakashi continued, "is to go undercover."

A/N: So... how was it? I hate to sound needy, but REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW! I will love you forever. If you're reading this just for some SasuNaru, I promise it will come, but there needs to be some plot build up first. If you want to, you can review and tell me to write a one shot to hold you over. I'll do it if you want me to!

Chibi Kakashi: Shut up already. You're boring the readers.

Chibi Sasuke: What readers? Like anyone would read this crappy fanfiction.

Me: LKRJEGHSERJSDF SHUT UP SASUKE. No one likes you anyway!

Chibi Sakura: ...!!

Chibi Naruto: ...!!

Sasuke Fangirl #53235: ...!!

Me: ... oh shit.

Chibi Sakura: REVIEW!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Sorry for the major cliffie! I got a few complaints about that... heh...

Ok, so I kept half of my promises. It IS over 1,000 words, but I failed at updating sooner. I am so sorry! sobs Please forgive me!

Anywho, thanks to everyone who reviewed! Thank you thank you thank you! I hope you like this next chapter. I tried to finally get the plot moving. There will be much more character interaction in the next chapter. There were just a few plotholes that needed to be filled first. ENJOY!

Naruto twiddled his fingers. _How awkward was this?_ The two agents were sitting mutely in the back of the car that would take them to the appropriate meeting point where they would get further instructions. Even after Naruto asked a million questions, shouted at Kakashi, and threatened to quit the force, the man only smirked at his two subordinates and ushered them out the door. The only thing that stopped Naruto from breaking down into fake tears and begging the Chief on bended knees was the dark presence of his partner. No way was he going to give the Uchiha any dirt on him this early in the mission.

"So… what do you think the Chief meant about going undercover?" Naruto asked tentatively, deciding that it would be better to break the silence earlier than later.

"It's obvious. If you want a definition, use a dictionary, idiot." Naruto sat with his mouth open, staring stupidly at his unresponsive partner. He could understand the rudeness at the bookstore, but now that they had been introduced and were going to be working together, he thought that the other man would have been more hospitable. Obviously, he was mistaken.

"What is your problem? What did I ever do to you?" Naruto asked, almost hysterically. It wasn't that people were throwing themselves at his feet or anything, but they were usually at least polite. Sasuke just kept looking straight ahead, as if the car was completely empty save himself and the driver. "Fine," Naruto shrugged and faced forward, "but we're going to have to work together at some point." A flicker of annoyance crossed the Uchiha's face before it returned to its normal emotionless state.

Luckily, it was at this point that the car pulled up at The Plaza Hotel and Spa. As they entered the lobby, they noticed that some sort of convention was taking place. A banner proclaimed, "Coloring Outside the Lines, Proudly Celebrating its 15th Anniversary." _Must be some sort of Artist's gathering_, thought Naruto. Sasuke's brow furrowed. Naruto, although not usually astute, noticed the gesture. _Maybe he's not the creative sort_, guessed the blonde. They walked up to the desk in the lobby. Naruto looked around while they waited in line. There seemed to be a lot of men. In fact, aside from the lady working at the front desk, he didn't see any female among the lobby inhabitants. Weird. Naruto's train of thought was interrupted by the Uchiha's low tones.

"Trust Kakashi to give me this sort of assignment. Jerk."

"What do you mean?" Naruto turned towards his partner. Sasuke started, as if he hadn't realized he had spoken aloud.

"Nothing," Sasuke mumbled as he stepped up to the front of the desk.

"Hello and welcome to The Plaza Hotel and Spa," the lady at the desk gushed, flipping her obviously dyed hair behind her shoulder and flashing them a huge grin, "How may I help you two handsome gentlemen?"

"We're here for the convention. The room is under the name Hatake." Naruto glanced at his partner in complete confusion. Chief Hatake hadn't said anything about booking them rooms, let alone attending a convention of any sorts.

"Oh," the woman looked deeply disappointed, "Right. I'll just go get your room keys then." She walked off muttering to herself. Naruto only caught the phrases "so not fair," and "always the hot ones." He had no idea what was going on. However, instead of blowing their cover, Naruto wisely decided to wait until they got to their rooms to ask his partner anything. That is, if the stony man would grant him more than a sentence.

"Here you go." The woman had returned. "I hope you enjoy your stay." She watched them wistfully as they walked away.

After pushing through a crowd of extremely friendly men, the pair of agents reached the elevator. They were joined by another pair of men, so Naruto couldn't ask his partner about the strange series of events. Sasuke pushed the button for the third floor, and Naruto stood next to him in silence. He watched as one of the other occupants in the elevator straightened his teal satiny shirt studded with sequins. _Definitely an artist's convention_, thought Naruto. The elevator dinged and the doors slid open to admit them to the third floor. After walking for a bit, they reached room 307. Sasuke slid the key in and pushed open the door.

"Uh," said Naruto, hesitantly, "which one is my room?"

"_This_ is your room," Sasuke replied.

"Oh. Then, which one is your room?" The only answer that Naruto got was an exasperated glare. Sasuke strolled into the room, flicking on the lights. Naruto shuffled confusedly after him. "I still don't – "

"Don't you understand, you moron?" Sasuke whirled to face Naruto, able to finally explain to his dim-witted partner now that the door was shut and the room secure. "This is _your _room. This is _my _room. We are supposed to _share_."

Naruto glanced around the moderately sized room. He ignored the mini fridge, the sliding glass door, the spacious bathroom, and the floor-length mirror. "But where are _you_ going to sleep?" Naruto asked, honestly mystified, gesticulating at the one king sized bed in the middle of the room.

Sasuke groaned. How the hell was he expected to work with this idiot? Was he going to have to spell every step of their mission out in big block letters for the dolt? He took a deep breath, getting his anger under control. "If you hadn't noticed, we are obviously supposed to be masquerading as if we were attending the convention. That is why—"

"Oh yea," interrupted Naruto, "How did you know about the room? Did the Chief tell you before I got there or something?"

"No," Sasuke was almost shaking from his forced patience, "I just know him really well, that's all. Anyways, what I was –"

"And I still don't understand about the room! Is the force low on funds or something? Why—"

"If you would desist from interrupting me," Sasuke was close to growling, "then I could explain properly—"

"And why are we supposed to be artists? I can't even paint or anything, does the Chief expect us to fake talent? And why did we both have to be men? Why—"

"SHUT UP!" Sasuke shouted. He couldn't believe it. He had only met this, this _person_ less than an hour ago, and he'd already affected him more than anyone had for years. He hadn't lost his temper since… Ah well, better to focus on the problem at hand. The really stupid, really annoying problem at hand. "Let me make this easy enough for your little mind to understand," Sasuke continued, after seeing that his outburst had had the desired effect, "We both had to be male because we're supposed to be _together. _We have one room because of the same reason. We had to come to this hotel because our target is obviously attending the convention, and it wouldn't do to show up at a convention like this and then blow our cover by getting separate rooms." Sasuke paused, hoping that the blonde had understood.

"But… I still don't…" Sasuke sighed inwardly. Obviously he hadn't. Oh he was going to murder Kakashi for this.

"Look," he started awkwardly, "Our target is gay. This is a convention for gay, male couples. That clear enough for you?"

The only answer Sasuke received was Naruto's slack jawed look of shock. He supposed he'd better start to get used to this.

A/N: So... what did you think? I'm in a writing mood, so hopefully chap 4 will be up soon... reviews will ensure that!

Chibi Sakura: Yaaay! I had some lines!

Chibi Naruto: Yea, but you didn't sound too happy...

Chibi Sakura: Well, how could I be? I just found out in the story that Sasuke... that he's... trails off in sobs

Chibi Naruto: What?

Chibi Sasuke: You still don't get it do you.

Chibi Naruto: WHAT?!

Chibi Sasuke: shakes head

Chibi Kakashi: HA.

Chibi Sasuke: strangles Chibi Kakashi

Me: okaaaay... enough of that. Let's not kill Kakashi before he can inflict even more humiliation on his lovely little Uchiha!

Chibi Sasuke: HEY!

Me: runs away giggling madly

A lesson to be learned by any creator of original fiction: Never ever ever give creative licensing to any of the following: fangirls, fanboys, slashers, insane people, teenage girls who sport evil grins, santa clause, or lollipops. It's just not a good idea. (Not that I have creative licensing... D:)


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Hi all! I just got back from Yosemite so I had lots of time to write there. Here's an update for you! Thanks to everyone who faved/reviewed/even read this fic. I really appreciate it! I apologize in advance for any OOCness. Enjoy!

...

Naruto just sat there, stunned. If someone had slipped scorpions down his shirt, he wouldn't have noticed. Sasuke was sorely tempted to do just that.

"Look," Sasuke sighed, "We should probably unpack our equipment and do a thorough surveillance of the area." It looked like he would be the instigator in this partnership. (1)

Naruto seemed to snap out of his daze. "Right. Equipment. Surveillance. FBI stuff. Got it." He moved to unpack the suitcase that Kakashi had given to him.

"And we'll also need to get out story straight," Sasuke amended.

"Story?" Naruto dragged the suitcase over towards the wall. He propped the suitcase against the closed and leaned against a bureau.

"Yes. Story. About how we met, fell in love, and all that sappy bullshit."

Naruto promptly fell backwards over the bureau. _Great_, thought Sasuke, _Not just a moron, but a clumsy moron at that._

"Wh-what?!" stuttered Naruto. He looked so petrified at the idea that Sasuke momentarily got over his exasperation and felt a bit affronted. Surely he couldn't be all that bad looking. His thoughts must have shown on his face (for once) because Naruto twigged.

"Oh man, sorry, didn't mean it like that. Just forgot about the mission for a second. Heh." He smiled awkwardly.

"Whatever. Let's just plan this out." Sasuke didn't return the smile. "We met at the University of Washington where I was majoring in Chemistry and you were majoring in—"

"Cooking!" interjected Naruto.

"Fine, Culinary Arts." Sasuke ground his teeth. He had been going to say Density 101, but whatever kept his partner – Sasuke frowned at the double meaning – happy.

Sasuke continued, "We met through mutual friends during—"

"No! In a coffee shop! A coffee shop is so much more romantic!" For someone who had been so shocked at the idea of acting gay a moment ago, Naruto certainly had an uncanny ability to bounce right back.

"Sure," Sasuke growled, "A coffee shop." Was Kakashi trying to piss him off or set him up? The grey haired pervert had known that Sasuke was gay longer than the Uchiha had known himself. It would be just like him to put him on an 'undercover' mission just to get him a date. But by the looks of this guy, he was so straight that it was painful. If Kakashi paired them together to annoy Sasuke, he would just have to plan his revenge carefully. If it was the latter goal, well. Better to go with the former. As attractive as the blonde was, no way would Sasuke give Kakashi the satisfaction of a good gloat. Sasuke snapped back to attention as Naruto continued to fabricate their 'first meeting'.

"Yea, and I sat down at the table next to you, and you just couldn't take your eyes off me, and—"

"A bit full of yo7urself, aren't you?" Sasuke commented, although he privately agreed with his imaginary coffee shop self. _Can you stop staring at him for ten seconds?!As dense as he is, he's bound to notice sooner or later! _Sasuke forced himself to stare at the contents of the suitcase entrusted to him by Kakashi. He blushed Maybe Naruto was a safer bet.

"Anyways," Sasuke continued hastily, "After we met each other, we've been dating for two years, graduated, and started our own individual businesses. According to these ID tags—"

"Are those from the chief? He's so helpful!"

"Yes. Helpful." Sasuke handed Naruto his ID.

"James Fox, age twenty-five, male, American origin. But I'm half Japanese!" Naruto looked questioningly at Sasuke.

"You don't look it," his partner answered. He pulled out his own ID card. "Oh, very funny, Kakashi."

"What?" Naruto snatched the card before Sasuke could protest.

"Kai Maito, age twenty-four, male, Japanese origin," Naruto read. "What's so funny? I don't get it."

"It's just a little joke of Kakashi's. He named me after a… a friend of his. Just let it go. We should—" Sasuke was interrupted by his cell phone buzzing. "What?" He snapped. Only one person had the number, so there was no point in being polite.

"Oh, Sasuke, you didn't like my little joke? But Guy was so looking forward to officially adopting you." Sasuke could practically hear the man grinning impishly.

"What do you want, Hatake?"

"Whoa, calm down there. I was just calling to let you know that your little—" Sasuke could swear he heard a muffled chuckle, "—_convention_'s introductory lunch started fifteen minutes ago."

"WHAT?!" Sasuke slammed his cell phone shut without waiting for an answer.

"What was that? What did the chief want? Did he say—" Naruto would have proceeded to pelt Sasuke with questions if the Uchiha hadn't grabbed Naruto's wrist and hauled him out of their hotel room.

"We're late. Put your ID in your wallet and come _on. _We don't have time to change that hideous tie of yours."

"What's wrong with my tie?!" Naruto said, affronted, as he stuffed the ID card into his suit pocket. Sasuke didn't answer. He just pulled Naruto down two flights of stares. They finally reached the lobby out of breath and panting. They looked up to ind a room filled with men sitting at lunch tables, all ignoring the speaker on the stage at the front of the room and instead were watching Naruto and Sasuke with great interest.

"Sorry—we're—late—" breathed Sasuke, "got—caught up…"

"Don't worry hun," someone at the front shouted, "If I had _that _hottie all to myself, I would have been even _later_." There were chuckles, and the convention members gradually turned back to the speaker in front.

"As I was saying, the formal dinner will take place…" Naruto was ignoring the man at the front. He was still a bit shocked by the comment from earlier. He awoke from his stupor with a jolt as Sasuke tugged him to a table in the back where name tags were being distributed.

_I have to focus! This Sasuke guy seems like he has been doing this for a while. I can't let him think I suck at my job!_ Naruto took a deep breath and flashed a smile at the teenage girl sitting at the name tag table. She just raised a bored eyebrow.

"Names?" she asked lazily, blowing a large pink bubble.

"Kai Maito and—"

"James Fox," Naruto (2) practically gushed at the girl, "_So_ glad to meet you. We are just so excited to be here, right babe?" Naruto linked his arm into Sasuke's and beamed at him.

Sasuke just stood there, flabbergasted at Naruto's change of attitude. Naruto, noting Sasuke's silence, smiled back at the girl. "Don't mind him, he's just embarrassed to be here. Our first convention and all."

"Uh-huh." The girl looked painfully uninterested. "Here you are." She handed them their nametags.

"Thanks!" Naruto flounced off with Sasuke trailing helplessly at his side. As the blonde pulled him into an empty seat at a table, Sasuke whispered, "What the HELL was that?!"

"I was playing the part! You're the one who was all set on having people believe us," Naruto muttered out of the corner of his mouth. He grinned at the others occupying the table. Sasuke glanced around too. To his right was a grey haired man with glasses giving Sasuke and Naruto an analyzing look. On the other side of him sat who Sasuke assumed was his partner, a pale man with long black hair who gave Sasuke a very disturbing look. He licked his lips. Sasuke jumped inwardly and leaned unconsciously into Naruto.

Naruto looked startled, but didn't back away. _He's just playing the part_, Sasuke's inner voice told him. Sasuke decided to ignore the creepy pale guy and instead focused on the couple to Naruto's left. A hulking man was sitting next to a petite teen with long shimmering black hair. He would have mistaken the boy for a girl if not for their current location. Sasuke felt almost out of place with short hair.

Sasuke received another shock as the big man gave him a sharp-toothed grin. Was everyone here insane? He focused on the remaining couple at the table. They seemed normal enough. A tall man with spiky brown hair and a burn on his face was sitting next to an equally tall man with slightly longer brown hair. Sasuke blinked as the latter selected a toothpick from the middle of the table and placed it between his teeth.

"Okay everyone," Sasuke focused his attention on the speaker on the stage, "I want you to introduce yourselves to the three other couples at your table. Feel free to throw in any fun facts or juicy—" the man waggled his eyebrows "—details. We're all friends here!"

"Oh, I _love _meeting new people!" Sasuke was horrified to realize that it had been Naruto who had spoken. "Hi, I'm James and this here is Kai. Isn't he just _adorable_?" Sasuke blinked. Did Naruto just call him, a guy, the guy who had been goading him since they'd started the job, adorable? Come to think of it, Sasuke had never been called adorable.

"Yes, he certainly is." Sasuke almost had a heart attack. The speaker was the pale creepy man. He winked at Sasuke.

Naruto pulled Sasuke closer to him, but kept on beaming. "We've been together for two years. We both love music, and I love to cook. I could go on forever, but let's hear from someone else! I'm sure you're tired of having me talk. Kai here tells me that often enough." Naruto playfully slapped Sasuke's arm. Good thing Naruto had done all the talking, thought Sasuke. He didn't think he could put two words together let alone form complete sentences the way Naruto was clinging to him.

...

1) LOL. Yep. Sasuke shall be the seme. But I don't think he meant it like that… X3

2) Sorry that Naruto's really OOC in remembering facts here, but I thought that he shouldn't be an FBI agent if he couldn't actually do his job to some extent. So for the sake of the story, he's going to be a bit bumbling when it comes to trivial things, but when it comes down to it, he'll come through. I promise :D.

A/N: Longest update so far. So proud of myself! And I had so much fun writing in Orochi-kun. kehehehehe. He is so effing creepy! Anyways, reviews are much appreciated and I'll definitely try and have chap 5 out soon.

Chibi Naruto: Why do I have to be the uke?!

Me: ...

Chibi Sakura: :still sobbing:

Chibi Sasuke: Because. I'm just so much more manly. :smirks:

Me: YEA RIGHT. YOU HAVE GIRLY HAIR. :runs away from Sasuke fangirls:

Chibi Sakura: Review, review, review!


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